Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Self Control

"Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city." Proverbs 16:32 NIV

"He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city." Proverbs 16:32 KJV

I probably will sound like a broken record.  But God is really dealing with me on this and I am being a slow learner.  Our words, especially out of anger, can hurt others.  What we say and do out of frustration does not just affect us.  It affects our spouse, kids, and those around us.  Last week after talking about how we speak to our spouse, I failed.  Then I became so frustrated with myself because just that morning I had blogged about it.

We all know that we will get angry and frustrated at some point.  Maybe even daily.  But we need to keep our eyes on Christ and lay the anger at the cross.  There are times when my son can get angry while doing his school work.  This is something that breaks my heart and I have prayed many, many times about.  Today I told him when he gets angry he needs to just tell me he that needs a break and he can go sit in a quiet place for a moment.  That is something I need to try as well.  Instead of lashing out, go to a quiet place and pray.  

"Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few." Ecclesiastes 5:2

Our words need to be few.  We need to calm our self and pray that God gives us wisdom and guidance when dealing with anger.

Not only do our harsh words affect others, but they can hinder our Christian witness.  Even the best built homes can have "thin walls."  When you and your spouse are having a loud disagreement your neighbors can very likely hear.  What is that doing to your witness?  Like I mentioned before, when we let frustration with the kids get to us at the store or restaurant, what is that doing to our witness?

Friends, just another reminder, lay your anger at the foot of the cross.  Find peace in Him.  Do not speak out of anger or frustration.  And pray that God will help you to have self control over this.

Sweet Blessings~

P.S. Ladies, when you husband comes home today, do not forget to greet him with a smile and kind word.


  1. I like that you are writing about this! I always need God's help on this issue. The verses that help me alot have been Proverbs 29:11, "Fools vent their anger but the wise quietly hold it back." anf James 1:26 "If you are religious yet dont keep a tight reign on your tongue, you are deceived and your religion is worthless." That impacted me greatly. I dont want my religion to be worthless! I'm convinced through these anger management growth opportunities God is continually molding us in His image.

  2. Jenifer, thank you once again for this reminder. We're all guilty now and again of speaking out of turn or becoming frustrated and allowing that emotion to affect those around us. May all of us hear His Voice and feel that Peace to calm our Spirits and help us exercise restraint. Have a Blessed Day!

  3. Anger is one thing that really messes Christians up. Maybe like you told your son, we need to be in a quiet place to pray and ask God to help us with this problem. Once our words are said there is no taking back, we can say we are sorry but they are still there even though our words were not directed to any certain person, we showed the anger. Thanks for a wonderful post.

  4. I am really working on this too. And I've been asking God to change my heart so I'm not so sensitive to things my husband says. Most of the time he is just goofing around, but I take it too seriously and get upset. I need to learn to loosen up. :)

  5. I have prayed often that my soft answer would turn away wrath, the emphasis on my ability to have that soft answer. Thank you for the honest reminder.

  6. I particularly liked your encouragement for wives to offer those kind words to their husbands. I know the value of hearing those words - whether my day was a challenge or a joy. Wives can do so much to help their husbands grow into the Spiritual Head they were meant to be.

  7. This is a constant struggle! It is so easy for frustration to get the better of me, especially as a mom. Thanks for the reminder that it's okay to take a mental time out when those feelings arise! :)

  8. I am starting to learn the peace of letting my words be few... after a few victories it gets better because you know what it feels like to have made the right choice and that begins to be sweeter than the release of lashing out. The Spirit is often like a broken record playing on our hearts when He really wants us to get something... thank You God that you don't give up on us!


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