FEAR FIGHTING

Balconies terrify me. I have zero fear of heights, as a matter of fact, I kind of like heights. When our family goes on our annual family reunion vacation, I love standing on the balcony 13 stories high and watching the waves crash to the shore. Yet, balconies terrify me when my kids are on them. I would have nightmares in the weeks leading up to our trip, nightmares of a child falling to their death. We set a rule that kids were not allowed on the balcony without an adult and they were never allowed to push a chair to the railing to 'get a better look.' Now that my kids are all teens, they don't frighten me as much but I still have this crippling fear with my nieces and nephews. I make sure everyone knows my rule of not being on the balcony without an adult and I make sure my teens do not pick up a little cousin to hold them while on the balcony. A healthy fear leads to respect. I don't want my kids to fear heights or balconies, but I do want them to understand the risks and dangers and respect that. But for myself, it is an all out fear.

I am a children's pastor. Put me in front of a crowd of kids and I am perfectly calm and ready to go. Put me in front of adults, not so much. I start to feel like I am out of breath, my voice starts to shake and things slowly turn black. I can't even give an announcement in front of my church, to the people I know and love and talk to regularly! It's crazy! I don't exactly know why I fear speaking in front of adults so much, but even the thought sends my heart racing.

I remember times of deep fear like sitting in the middle of a tornado while my babies were miles away at my parents and not knowing if we would survive or if my kids were safe; being on the phone with my husband while he had a car accident and I couldn't hear him, only the loud crash and cars passing by and having no idea if he was okay; waiting on the test results to hear if my daughter had cancer; and, right now as I write this, waiting to hear the results of my grandmother's latest cancer scan.

Fear is something that can choke the life out of someone. It literally stops our breathing. We all have experienced this fear at some point. Maybe from a phobia or a health scare, whatever it is, a good percentage of the population has suffered from some type of fear.

We know that we shouldn't have fear. The Bible tells us 365 different times to not be afraid. There are 365 days in a year. I do not see this as a coincidence. God doesn't want us to fear. Yet here we are, still struggling with fear.

Kelly Balarie, author of the new book Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage To Overcome Your Fears, reminds us that God is right beside us. That He is running right next to us. And that He has good plans for us. Kelly reassures us that we have no need to fear but we have ever reason to be courageous.

Are you struggling with fear right now? Do you know someone who is and you are unsure how to help them? Check out Kelly's book Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage To Overcome Your Fears. You will be blessed as you learn to fight fear and live courageous.

Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage To Overcome Your Fears was featured on Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda's favorite things at Christmas time.

Fear Fighting: When You’ve Lost Sight of Yourself {Guest Post}

Today I am so excited to have Kelly Balarie sharing with us about her brand new book Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears. Please help me welcome Kelly!


I stand agitated and angry; I made him upset yet again.
I stand bare and defenseless, saying, "What can I do to make you happy?"
I stand exposed and exiled, "I will never be enough for you."

I stand stripped and pleading, "Whatever you want me to be, I can be, you will see."
I stand raw and helpless; I am not liked me for me.
I stand before people knowing, they want to use me.

I stand before the playground mother thinking, "I talk too much, speak too quickly, she hates me."
I stand before injurers declaring, “I am not worth hurting again.”

I take a big stand. I morph into the woman that man wants me to be. I smile when I am supposed to. Hold the doors like a good girl. And, offer to help when appropriate. I do what people need me to do.

Yet, the scary part is - I stand before myself and realize I don't even know me.

With all my proving and posturing, I’ve lost me. Somewhere I’ve vanished.

Have you? Have you gotten lost somewhere behind the grand persona you project? Are people demanding you be someone you are not?

It’s easy to blame. The fact of the matter, however, is - blame is the biggest inhibitor to change. I don’t want to get so worried about changing them – I never change me. I’ve done that for so long.

What I want to do, is get so open to letting God change me, he rearranges me in new freedom. In a freedom where I am fearless and hopeful and graceful. Where man doesn’t dictate who I am, but where man is the object of all the love I have. There is a difference there.

This is why I wrote the book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears. It was my freedom-call to God. So much, I’m finding, of battling against fear, is about submitting your heart to God. This verse summarizes it well: Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. (1 Pet. 5:6)

When you get low below God, all he has moves over you. Some of it sinks into you.

This is what I’ve found. Less am I filling other people’s gaps and more am I going to God to fill mine.

What about you? Where is your love sourced from – a place of pleasing man or pleasing God?

Wherever you stand today, God’s grace stands taller, higher and wider. It is never too early or too late to start Fear Fighting. Learn the power of God’s love, the strength of his truth and the depths of new courage he wants to pour out on you.

Interested in fighting fear? Join the 4 Days to Fearless Challenge!

About the book, Fear Fighting, Awakening the Courage to Overcome Your Fears:
Author and Speaker, Kelly Balarie didn’t always fight fear – for a large part of her life, she was controlled by it. Yet, in her book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, with God, Kelly charts a new course. Join Kelly, on the journey to go and grow with Christ’s bravery, the Spirit’s counsel and God’s unending love that squelches fear. This book reads like a love letter from God, while offering practical heart-calming prayers, anxiety-reducing tips, and courage-building decrees that will transform your day. www.fearfightingbook.com

About Kelly Balarie:
Kelly is both a Cheerleader of Faith and a Fighter of Fear. She leans on the power of God, rests on the shoulder of Christ, and discovers how to glow in the dark places of life. Get all Kelly’s blog posts by email or visit her on her blog, Purposeful Faith. You can also find a variety of resources for your fight against fear here.