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The relationship I have with my son is a difficult one. I love him with my entire heart, he is my world. If you are a mom, you know I would lay my life down for him without even a thought. But he has always been somewhat of a moody little boy and entering these early teen years have just made him all the more moody. I have been working really, really hard on trying to understand him and be the best mom for him. I am currently reading The Five Love Languages and praying that God reveals to me exactly how to connect with my son.
I have also been working how to not be a 'yeller' but to remain calm. God has given me Proverbs 15:1, "A gentle answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger." So when my son begins to get angry, begins to get frustrated, I close my eyes, breath a prayer and try to remain calm. Yet most times, he remains angry. The other night, after having a long, hard, draining battle with him, I went to God broken. God, it does't work! The more gentle I become, the more angry he gets. Is that verse a lie!? Why isn't it working God? Now, I know that the Word of God is all truth. There is no doubt in my mind.
God gently told me, I am still at work here. Give it time. Persevere. Press on, you can do it. While my son may still be dealing with anger, I can trust God and still work on my gentle answers. I don't want my son to ever doubt my love for him. I don't want him to ever doubt that I care and like him. I don't want him to grow up thinking I tolerated him only because I had to. I want him to grow up with complete confidence that he was and still is loved by his mother. I want that love to grow and help him to love back. I want that love to help him to love his future family. I want there to be a legacy of love in our family that passes on from generation to generation. In order for this love to exist and to grow, I must be gentle and loving, even if he is not ready to be.
Friends, if you are dealing with a similar situation, maybe your child, your spouse, a co-worker or neighbor, don't give up. Regardless of how they respond to you, work on your gentle answers.